Jokes about Grammar

Which word becomes shorter after you add two letters to it? (I just gave you a hint.) Short.
I once dated an apostrophe. Too possessive.
The past, present and future met in a dark alley. It was tense.
A pregnant woman went into labor and started shouting, “Couldn’t! Wouldn’t! Shouldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”? She was having contractions.
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